A heart full of many emotions

We buried my father yesterday – a stark reminder, of the inevitability in life, of death. Rather than use it as a negative, I choose repeatedly to remind myself how fortunate I am, how grateful I am, how precious each day is. I did proof read a story this morning, in the early hours when others slept. I also walked my dog, drank in the early morning sunshine shining on the Ontario maple leaves as they turned from green to gold and scarlet. I lifted my face to the sun and gave thanks to my father for the indescribable gifts he passed on. He will always be my role model for a good man. He was an adventurer, a self directed lover of knowledge, a problem solver, a pilot, a builder of boats, a carver of birds, a good husband. and a great father. From him, I believe, I was given the inspiration to be a good human on this planet – to do good, to be kind and to follow my passions. It all circles around to my decision to be an author in my fifties, to embark on a new journey, one woven from the wisdom of my past with a burst of passion for the magic of a story.

A belief in magic has always been mine. A belief in the power of thought and word – I learned along the way. What shall I focus on today? I will stay aware of the tender area of sadness in my heart. I will be kind to my mother who I will see again shortly. I will in other moments soften my belly and breathe into the precious moments of this day. Willow, my service dog is pressed against my leg as I write – aware of my sadness at saying goodbye to a man I have always respected and loved. Be the best version of you, he would say. You can do anything you set your mind to. Today I will remember that, and I will add that I will live, think, and act, from a heart that is full of many emotions.